Land of Milk & Honey?


A recent news item has gone almost unnoticed. Certainly, its impact has not had housewives resorting to strikes, traffic blockades, bandhs et al. For what, you ask? By god, the price of honest-to-goodness (!) milk has been increased.

Milk will become dearer from December 15 with Bangalore Dairy announcing hike in Milk prices from Rs 13 to Rs 14 per litre, Karnataka Public Works Minister H D Revanna announced recently.

Now what is a Public Works Minister doing announcing milk price increases? Simple. Apparently, the good minister was upset everytime dodanna HDK (or is it chikkathamma) was hogging the media limelight. So, a surreptious media gag order was issued against the Minister in charge of Milk Production from announcing this price hike.

Anyway, this announcement was followed by a loud protest within the establishment…er, sorry, my humble house. For one, the missus said that the Minister was lying through his milky teeth as it was never Rs 13/-… it was always sold at Rs 14/-. Secondly, she said that with this hike, milk would move from being a basic item to one that would henceforth be purchased by only the creamy layer! That was enough to bring things to a boil. It was certainly not milk as the price increase of Rs. 1 has resulted in an advance shortage in the market. It was being hoarded in anticipation of future profits, you see. If you don’t believe me, check out the share price of Bangalore Diary on the Bangalore Stockists Exchange.

Its certainly a sad state of affairs as I have always been the one to prescribe imbibing milk for its healthy qualities over other more spirited drinks. Only, everytime I said this, I have received looks that sought to check if, under my clothing, lurks a Martian. You know, like in that film Men-in-Black? Apparently, we are living in the pub capital of India, Bangalore. Sorry, Bengalooru.

Speaking to newsmen here, the minister said the hike was necessitated following an increase in prices of materials related to the milk production. However, prices of other products such as ghee and butter would remain unchanged, he added.

Just what the minister meant by “materials related to milk production” is something that has skimmed me by. If you have udderstood something, please clarify. In the meanwhile, we are checking with CFTRI if coffee can be made with butter or ghee instead. Stay tooned!

Further, the minister said that the increased amount would be passed on to the farmers engaged in dairying

Great, just great. The better half has just come up with an ingenious scheme. One, to add to the ongoing brain-drain happening all over India, she suggested moving our homes to Houston…er, sorry, Hoskote. Secondly, we are going to invest in about a 1000 cows. Even at 10 litres per cow per day, thats a bucketful of profits everyday….PC wouldn’t even know abou tit. Too good an idea to milk, isn’t it?

Yeah, I know. The cynics among you think its time I mooved bag and baggage somewhere in the Milky way.


2 Comments so far

  1. Chitra (unregistered) on December 15th, 2006 @ 5:37 pm


  2. Ravi (unregistered) on December 17th, 2006 @ 5:39 pm

    @ Chitra -> :-))

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